Monthly Archives: October 2017


​                Being a global citizen in the 21st century is a privilege and a piece of cake. People are connected to each other, giving and receiving information within a click of a second on the palms of their hands.  The growth of science and technology has been of a very big impact in today’s society especially to growing teens and tweens like me and you. It was just last week, I was talking to a good friend who happens to study oversees via whatsapp call, and after a very long nice conversation I began to think, waoh!! Technology makes the world “flat”, I mean its amazing right?. The growth of social medias has taken connection to a whole new level, making life as simplified as unfriending someone on facebook, just a click of a button and voila!! We are not friends anymore. 

            Never the less, technology has it’s pros and cons. Probably there is more isolation than connection. Have you ever been in a family reunion or party where everyone seems to be praying to a “god” who won’t talk back, thanking him for the communionship but you realize it’s their phones they are busy with?. That is what I’m talking about, technology has created more of “I’s” than “We’s” , technology has brought more of “self-ies”, technology has brought more isolation than connection. While we’re busy chatting with multiple strangers in the internet, technology is denying us the opportunity to make real conversations and connections. I have come to realize most people who look to be “intimate” on social media are “boring” in real life. We can not communicate and hold real conversations anymore. It has become my biggest concern that the 21st tweens can not seat and hold conversations, I mean who approaches a girl in real life anymore? (you’re smiling right), these small things called phones have replaced “I love you” to “I luv u” and someone out there thinks there is no difference between the two. We are not able to make real friends, real relationships all because they look too good in the internet and where are lazy to replenish them in real life. 

                    Well, may I get my self clearly understood, I’m not saying technology is bad or it should somehow be abandoned. All I’m saying is technology should not take us away from the reality of life, it should not deny us the opportunity of eating a healthy meal like we used to always do in the past, everyone at the table listening and talking to real people about real things instead of holding our phones under the table up-to dating our statuses to “having dinner with fam”, what family are you talking about?. 

Does social media create more isolation? Don’t stand on the fence, feel free to tell me what you think 

May the transformation forces be with you 





I googled the effects of Pornography . After I had written “the effects of” , nicotine,heroine and cocaine were among the suggestions.
Google knows that 1 out of 4 internet searches are porn related and it’s here suggesting cocaine. Let’s leave this 19 year old aside.
Before we debate on  whether Pornography watching is right or wrong. Let’s see what Pornography watching and Masturbation have to offer.
1.Relieves sexual tension
This is the basic idea behind the two. Masturbating releases this tension and has kept most young and old people going for long without sex. An avarage man masturbates 4 times a week and it’s the nearly half  for girls.

The numbers are going higher because there is sexual content everywhere these days . The songs are sexual
The movies are extremely sexual
To top that up with social media and the fashion industry

Its hard to not think of it being sorrounded by all these sexual content
Oh even jokes are sexual
2.Disrupts intimacy in a relationship
The basis of any relationship is not sex . Relationships fulfill the human need to belong ,to love and to be loved .it is in this loving that each of the patners offers themselves to the  other partner  in different ways one of them being Sex. And so watching porn changes the way one sees a relationship from a support system to sex alone. Relationships get harder because no one knows what are relationship is without sex. And so one doesn’t reap all the benefits of being in a relationship.

Apart from this the image of other human beings becomes that of lust and sets standards that are unrealistic to real life.This creates a feeling of inadequacy and downlooking to the reality around .

fake orgasm.jpg

  1. May lead to Depression
    Pornography is not usually watched in the cinema.

It is the worst case of addiction because while cocaine and heroin addiction is group / gang bases. A Pornography addiction occurs in the dark and is the hardest to get out of.
This addiction may lead to Depression because whenever we have orgasms , we feel happy because of a chemical in our brain called Dopamine. Now if this was a relationship it means you would grow fonder of the person you are making love to. But in the case of Pornography and Masturbation, this Dopamine makes us grow fonder of Pornography and masturbation . And our brain becomes used to extremely high levels of Dopamine that our normal level seem too low and so we feel low as well.Persistence of these especially if it is a stress reliever may lead to Depression and anxiety.

porn depression

  1. Personal growth
    In the journey of self development, self discipline and love are very essential .This includes learning to focus your energy on REAL relationships and REAL connections . If you are looking to break free from Pornography Addiction, you need to monitor the sexual content you are exposing yourself to, identify patterns that have led you to that addiction and find a healthy solution to them and engage yourself in fruitful social activities. Falling back to the addiction should not be the end of the struggles. You should be determined to rise back again no matter how many times you fall.


Resist that Click . Live a meaningful life .

All the best.


That shoe is very Nice..
It would go well with this matching fringe top
Fringes look perfect with Ripped jeans ,let me get this jeans chocker like Kim Kardashian’s
A hat and a matching bag are lifeee😌😌..

What the hell am I doing ..I just came to pick a dress for Molly’s birthday.. For the fourth time ..
I’ll get a pair of shoes too and a glitter handbag ..
The neck area is so empty I need a necklace too oh and matching earrings and a bracelet


And On and on and on


Black Friday Crowd shopping

We are in an ever increasing rush to accumulate ,own and dump this for that.
Unfortunately we buy some of these things believing they will bring us Content and fulfilmen which they don’t and so we dump them . Inside our homes.

Our spaces get smaller and our need to own more grows bigger.
And we are still not as happy as we thought we’d be.
We spend years working hard to get to the next level.. only to realise that there is a next level after that and a next and a next
Then we die ..

If we are lucky enough to get to the top , We realise that it doesn’t bring us as much joy as we thought it would. 

We have lost years climbing that ladder and we didn’t get to enjoy the journey because we were so obsessed with the destination.

Sometimes we think that our worth as people is determined by what we can afford and own and so we are so focused on proving that we can accumulate stuff. We accumulate this stuff and still nothing changes in our lives.

I shall not lie and say that money , status and fame are nothing because they are something. They are a result of a bigger thing. A much more valuable thing than all of them combined, and that is Purpose.

Whatever we buy , whatever we work hard for should serve that purpose and keep us in alignment with it.

If it doesn’t,it is TRASH.

This is what Minimalism is all about.
The goal of Minimalism is to free you and me from the greedy materialistic mode to Purposefulness .There are no rules with Minimalism only that you let go what you dont need.

In doing this , you are also going to buy more quality things, save more , have more space and not spend so much time taking care of things that are not taking care of you. 

I am going to leave you with 3 challenges today
1.Let go of all the TRASH you have.
Go through your things and throw ,sell or donate whatever is no longer useful.

2.Live in the moment. Appreciate the place where you are right now as it is. Also appreciate all the challenges and freedom it comes with.


3.Ask yourself these 3 questions before you buy anything
i.Must I buy this?

ii.Do I already own something that compliments this or does what it does?

iii.What are the three occasions in the next three months that I will use/wear it


Till Next time.

Let me know if you have any questions or opinions in the comments below.

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Written by

Irene Denis (

We try so much to make things work. We try so hard to know people and in the process they only tell us what they want us to know, and we miss out the tiny but very important details. We miss out details that we would have noticed if we took the time to notice rather than letting things be presented to us on a silver plate. A matter can be presented as white or black, shades of whatever color are non existent! The twentieth century has evolved and twisted everything. Meetings are held on the phone, plans and schedules are made in the phone, sermons are sent through social networks, people meet and actually date via social media. As if this is not enough to make my my great grandmother faint in shock (May her soul rest in peace) people actually get married through the internet!! I repeat myself, people nowadays creat an imaginary scene where they walk down the aisle and make their vows!!! (Lets all please have a moment of silence to ponder a while upon this….)

Sincerely speaking, i am no guru at this, but i think somethings were meant to be done at some place. But anyways, back to my point, people tend to make every conversation a Q n A session and sometimes a simple conversation may become an interrogation!

People just ask a lot of questions that other people have no honest answers for. If you want to know a persons true character or intention, it would be best to take some time getting to know them and let things unfold slowly, naturally. Not to mean that you shouldn’t ask any questions if you are interested in knowing something about them. Asking will help you align the person in the direction of what you would like to know in a smart and careful way. Turning a conversation into an interrogation session only allows you to hear what someone wants you to hear and not the complete truth.

You do not have to talk  to someone about a very complex topic like politics or what their future plans are to get to know them. A simple topic such as the weather of that particular day, their hobbies or what they like to do in their free time may bring out a lot in a person than a questionnaire you prepared for them.

As the pyramid of knowledge is built, the easy things come first and as you move up, the complex things follow. By then, they wouldn’t seem complex because the base that covered the easy staff was well laid.

I would like to relate this in cases where one is building a relationship that will later result into a fruitful marriage. Making choices such as the kind of house or car you would like, the number of children you would like to have, the schools they will go to, and your daily budget will come easy if you paid attention to the little details at the beginning of your relationship. The little but basic things matter a lot. A persons favorite color, hobbies, birth date, favorite food, sleeping or waking time. They may sound irrelevant, but your understanding towards these things is what will make your future better and easier to build.

It is my hope that we will look forward to have meaningful conversations, that will bring to surface our true selves, and allow us to accept each other for who we truly are. A castle would have never been a castle if it wasn’t for the first brick that was laid as a foundation. Every great relationship owes its foundation to the simple but basic things in life. I hope yours will do too, someday soon.



By Steven Chibanhila


      Well I was raised  and grew by the beach, while you had toys to make a Lego house, I had sand to build a sandcastle which sooner or later I watched it swallowed by the mother sea. To my experience, diversification is the greatest lesson I learned by the beach. I could explore and see footprints of each size, big and small, thick and thin and that made me realize, there is beauty in uniqueness.The uniqueness of red to blue or violet to green is what makes a rainbow 🌈 and I have lived to believe, life is a work of art. Cherish your uniqueness, that is what makes you beautiful for there is beauty in uniqueness. 

          The beach is metaphor to life, since like smooth waves in a sprinkled water basin it needed my focus to understand it’s reflection to life. The ocean storms so hard sometimes, so does my life, so does yours too, if I am to guess. But after every storm the sun will smile and I will feel the warmth, for, for every problem there is a solution, and the soul’s indefeasible duty is to be of good cheer.It is not going to storm forever, have courage better days are yet to come. 

          Growing up at a beautiful view of the east, I could see the sun rise and  watch it fall. That made me realize each day is a gift. Having access to life is nature’s golden opportunity to mankind, all we have to do is grab it and unleash our very best pottentials. So what I have been saying is, life is an adventure, dare it. A duty, perform it. An opportunity, take it. A journey, complete it. Life is a puzzle, we have to solve it and achieve the goal. 

The beach taught me that I need to look at life in a new way. And so must we, ladies and gentlemen. 

May the transformation forces be with you 

    Best regards